Jaaaaayzus. This is so unbelievable that I don’t know if I’ll be able to actually hit the “Publish” button. Help. Me.
Charlie. Effing. Sheen.
Apparently Mr. I’m High on Charlie Sheen made the rounds of the morning shows, but that wasn’t nearly enough. You see, Charlie was lit with “Crack Lighting” while each condescending network interviewer was given “Beauty Lighting”, so the folks at TMZ.com scored the TRUE gold interview.
If you’d like to join me in the “cold, steel rod in my eye”-headache, feel free. Just know you’ll NEVER get this time BACK.
WHY did I sit through that? Oh…and how ’bout Charlie passive-aggressively blaming his parents for all his
shit WINNING in life by leaving him on the school bus when he was seven years old, thus ending up in the bowels of the downtown Los Angeles County School bus barn. Don’t you understand? No one came looking for him! He was supposed to be left in Malibu, you guys.
Let that be a gotdamn lesson, Parents. You are all at risk of raising a Charlie Sheen. And guess what else? That’s my own experience talking right there.