Tag Archives: Nutty

Justin Bieber Had A Bad Week – Needs A Nap and His Blankie


Or a bottle. Or his blankie. Something! He’s been having the worst week ever, for a teenage millionaire, and I won’t call this a “breakdown” or a “downward spiral,” but something is up with this kid.

He’s been in London for a number of sold out shows at the O2 Arena, but the city isn’t treating him so kindly. After having the “worst birthday ever” when his party was shut down at club Cirque du Soir when bouncers suspected that underage kids were in attendance, he paraded around in a gas mask  and decided the world needed to see his tighty-whiteys under some ugly blue pants.

On Monday Justin was met with boos from his fans when he showed up two hours late to his own show. He performed for only 40 minutes due to “technical issues” but later apologized on Twitter saying, “I never have any intent to upset or let anyone down.” On Thursday, he collapsed backstage and was given emergency oxygen, then urged to cancel the rest of the show. Instead, he continued on with the performance and was hospitalized later. He tweeted a picture of himself, shirtless of course, relaxing in his room while listening to “Janice Joplin.” It’s Janis, child.

Things got even weirder when he had a run in with a paparazzo while he was leaving his hotel. After Justin shoved the man, the photog cried assault which prompted Bieber to conjure the spirit of Tupac Shakur and threaten him with a mcflurry of curse words, “I’LL F**KING BEAT THE F**K OUT OF YOU!” All while flanked by his babysitt…uh, bodyguards. Usher, come get your protege.

So a couple of questions. First off, who does Justin think he is? Has he ever been in a fight, EVER? Selena hurt you bad, didn’t she bruh? Where are his parents? Where the hell do you even get a gas mask? What has been causing his sudden illness? Are Lays‘ Sriracha chips good? Should I give ‘The Following’ another chance? Is Justin Bieber another spoiled child that can’t handle fame, and possibly his liquor? There could be a lot of things going on with him. Maybe the pressure of being pretty white boy is starting to get to him. His girl left, and the media is mocking him more than usual. He’s trying to be a grown up but his audience is still made up of girls who haven’t gotten their periods yet.

So I don’t really feel sorry for Biebs, he just seems to be having a crappy week. We’ve all been there but on a much smaller scale. He needs a break, and possibly a nap.

Oh My Gosh…I Just Had the BEST Workout, You Guys!

Yeah! I did! My daily morning workout consists hoarking up whatever is in my lungs into the sink each and every gee-dee day and yelling at the dogs to quit their damn whining. How ’bout THAT?

I swear to Gyaaah…if I read about one more blogger worth their weight in Lay’s Original Greasy and Salty potato chips bragging and Tweeting about how they “got in a nice bike-ride” before sitting down with a hot piece of carcinogens on their lap to write about today’s Breaking Bieber News, I’ll go insane and take alla y’all with me.

Oh, and everyone knows I don’t smoke; I just happen to like this striking portrait of myself, so hush it.  (I can hear you saying, “Wow! It really captures her essence!)    It does, doesn’t it?


The Craziest Quotes From Charlie Sheen’s ABC 20/20 Interview

"I'm a WINNER!"

Charlie Sheen (the oldest-looking 45-year old, non-homeless dude EVER), took over Twitter today, getting almost half a million followers barely two hours after he joined. I was hoping he would live tweet this mess of an interview along with the rest of us, but there was enough craziness to go around.

During the 20/20 Special we got a look at his home life, with his two girlfriends, and his workout routine. We all won!

When asked if he was on drugs:

“I am on a drug – it’s called Charlie Sheen. It’s not available because if you try it, you will die. Your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body.”

When asked what he thought of people saying he was bipolar:

“I’m not bi-polar, I’m bi-winning. I win here and I win there.”

What would it be like to have Charlie’s brain?:

“If you borrowed my brain for five seconds, you’d be like, ‘Dude! Can’t handle it, unplug this bastard!’ It fires in a way that’s maybe not from, uh… this terrestrial realm.”

When does Charlie sleep when he’s not winning?:

“I don’t sleep. I wait.”

When asked if there were drugs in his house at the moment:

“We don’t need to stay clean. There are no drugs in this house.”

WTF are you talking about Charlie?

“I don’t know. All these words just sound cool together. They come from my grand wizard master.

You got a drug addict, a pothead and a pornstar. What more could a guy want?”

I don’t know Charlie, you tell us.

My personal favorite, 

“I’m proud of what I created. It was radical. I exposed people to magic. I exposed them to something they’re never going to see in their boring normal lives.”

During the interview, there were flashes back to his 2000 interview with Charlie Gibson where he seemed relatively sane and normal.  Boy, how times have changed.

Never forget.