Tag Archives: Made For TV Hot Mess

Beyonce Presents Blue Ivy’s FACE To Get You To Watch Her HBO Documentary

“Life Is But A Dream”

Lots of y’all are pretty jaded when it comes to Beyonce and her Perfect Life…and I tend to agree to an extent.  But we’re all here for one thing and one thing ONLY.  Blue Ivy’s FACE, which has never been seen until it’s time to pimp out the HBO “documentary” (eyeroll) Life Is But A Dream airing tomorrow night.  If you don’t know what I’m referring to, this is how HBO is promoting the special:

Multiple Grammy®-winner, entrepreneur and actress Beyoncé will be the focus of an intimate feature-length HBO documentary film debuting Feb. 16, 2013, it was announced today by Michael Lombardo, president, HBO Programming.  Directed by the superstar, the film is a fusion of video that provides raw, unprecedented access to the private entertainment icon and high-voltage performances.

“Everybody knows Beyoncé’s music, but few know Beyoncé the person,” said Lombardo.  “Along with electrifying footage of Beyoncé onstage, this unique special looks beyond the 

“Along with electrifying footage of Beyoncé onstage, this unique special looks beyond the glamour to reveal a vibrant, vulnerable, unforgettable woman.”

“HBO has a history of pushing every boundary with class and authenticity,” said Beyoncé.  “Some of my favorite shows are on HBO, so I am excited that my film will be part of its bold programming. This film was so personal to me, it had to have the right home.”

The film is a multi-faceted portrait of the 16-time Grammy Award-winning singer, businesswoman, songwriter, actress, entrepreneur, wife and mother, showing off the extraordinary gifts that have made her a global phenomenon, and stripping away the veneer of stardom. It includes extensive first-person footage, some of it shot by Beyoncé on her laptop, in which she reflects on the realities of celebrity, the refuge she finds onstage and the transcendent joy of becoming a mother last year.

The film sheds light on her childhood in Houston, with home movies revealing the close bond she built with her family and charts the challenges Beyoncé felt when she decided to manage her career and build her own company, Parkwood Entertainment.  The film also captures the intense physical and emotional demands she goes through in the studio, preparing for live performances, running a business and her family life including her return to the spotlight after the birth of her daughter, Blue Ivy Carter, in January 2012.

I’m already grinding my teeth over the pretentiousness of it all.  I don’t know if I’ll even watch it, because Lord knows, I’ll yell at the TV too much already. (You should’ve heard me last night during that “certain part” on Scandal last night.  “Daaaaayuuummmmm!” was probably heard all the way across town.)  Oh–you’re waiting to see The Golden Platinum Child, aren’t you?


I’m pretty sure Beyonce had NOTHING to due with this child and she’s 100% Sean Carter’s baby.  I don’t know how he did it, but it goes to show what Money + The Illuminati can do.  Just kidding. (Not really.) Wait, yeah I am. Or not.

Jay Z and Baby Blue


A show of hands if you’re gonna watch this hot mess?



Former Disney Star Watch:Lindsay Lohan & Miley Cyrus

Don’t expect anything hard-hitting, kids.


According to Gossipcop, Linsday Lohan is set to be interviewed by Barbara Walters as part of a publicity tour for her upcoming Lifetime movie, Liz and Dick.

With her father releasing private cell phone conversations to TMZ, I’m not sure what is left to for LiLo to reveal. But a week is a decade in former teen star years, so Babs may have some new ground to cover, if she can actually catch up to Lohan.

Miley on Leno Photo: NBC

As for Miley, she has been making the talk show rounds promoting her guest appearance on Two and A Half Men. Despite some tweets from the Jada Pinkett Smith school of social media, Cyrus is still engaged to one of them Hemsworth Boys. She and the Thor, Red Dawn Hunger Games star Liam, recently revealed matching tattoos. Their ink is from a speech by Theodore Roosevelt. Let’s give them the benefit of the doubt and assume they know he is a US President. What’s the over/under they think he’s the one in the wheelchair from Annie?

Unsurprisingly, there is no date set for Lindsay Lohan’s interview with Barbara Walters.

Liz and Dick will premiere on Lifetime, November 25, 2012.

The Two and Half Men episode with Miley Cyrus will air on CBS, October 18, 2012.

First Trailer for ‘Liz & Dick’

Can you BELIEVE there’s a POSTER for this hot mess?


In “Made For TV Movies I Won’t Be Watching” news, the first trailer for Lifetime‘s “Liz & Dick” premiered, starring Lindsay Lohan as Elizabeth Taylor and Grant Bowler as her two-time husband Richard Burton. While Lohan looks NOTHING like Taylor, Bowler makes an okay Burton, but even towards the end of his life, Richard was an attractive guy and I’m seeing none of that here.

You barely hear her in this sneak peek, but she sounds nothing like Liz. Maybe I’m just not old enough to remember that time Taylor had a constant cigarette induced cold. It does highlight Burton and Taylor’s many fights, some of which had to have taken place in a movie trailer or two. That’s the only excuse Lindsay could use as to why she decided to leave a caravan owned by Elizabeth a mess. Maybe the trailer got in her way and didn’t pay attention to her flashing lights. Maybe the trailer told Lindsay that it liked Amanda Bynes‘ movies better.

It was the trailer’s fault. Obviously.