Tag Archives: Honk Shoooooooo

Barbara Walters’ ‘Most Fascinating’ List Was Pretty Dull

Something is a little ‘off’ in this photo–but HILLARY looks AMAZING!

Photo: ABC (sorta)

ABC aired Barbara Walters‘ annual ‘10 Most Fascinating People’ countdown, which this year featured some of the most uninteresting people of the year. There was Gabby Douglas, who did have an amazing Summer, winning gold and America’s heart during the Olympics.

Secretary of State Hillary Clinton was told by Walters that “men never get asked about their hair”–then proceeded to pester Hillary about her HAIR!.  Oh.  Insulting much?  Idiot.


Barbara and Seth

Barbara actually sat down to talk to New Jersey Governor Chris Christie (and grill him about his weight), Ben Affleck who I kind of forgot existed, but as we know, is campaigning like a mofo during Awards Season, and future Academy Awards host Seth MacFarlane. Apparently white guys are having a stellar year;  well, not if you’re Mitt Romney whom I did expect to make an appearance.

There was the British boyband One Direction, who are about as fascinating as toe jam.  Speaking of actual toe jam, Honey Boo Boo was on the list as well, to the embarrassment of, well, everyone. 


The one addition that really got me was E.L. James, the too proud author of the “Fifty Shades of Grey” book series. Barbara asked her if she had done research for her books, which detail the awful relationship between a virgin and some rich douchebag. She said yes, but wouldn’t talk about said “research” because she is full of shit. It bothers me that people actually think that this is what real BDSM relationships are like, and this woman is profiting from a book that started out asTwilight’ fan fiction.

Number one was former military general David Petraeus, who had made this list before but this time it was because of his cheating scandal involving the woman who wrote his biography. I’m sure 2012 is a year he’d like to forget.

Judas Video PREMIERE – Lady Gaga!


Watch while you can, y’all…it’s gonna be yanked any second.  (Why do I feel like like I’ve been yanked after sitting through this mess?)

Honestly, Stefani.  I expected far more from you.  We could have made this video in the Ventura High School AV Department (SHOUT OUT!) back in the day.  Take one part Janet Jackson’s “Escapade” video and part of her her brother’s “Beat It” video, cram into an old Oster blender, cross ourselves as the SCAT bus (that’s what it was called…don’t ask) drives past The Mission on our way home to The Avenue (we know who are are!), add some crows  CA CAAAAAW CA CA CA CA-ing ,  and we’re done.

These photo-grabs from the video are hilarious…

THIS one reminds me of a gross Dave Attell joke involving a dog’s peen and it being the reddest-red in the Crayola Crayon box.  (Look it UP, Donna, if you want to fully understand.) Or don’t.  Because I pretty much just ruined the punch-line.


The BAFTAS. “The King’s Speech”. The End.

The "Eyes Wide Shut" Award goes to....

Were the BAFTAs some sort of fund-raiser for The Royal Wedding?  I reckon there’s also a little stand outside Buckingham Palace selling tea and biscuits, yes?

EXACTLY. Helena Bonham Carter taking her BAFTA-win very seriously.

Oh, the TABLESCAPE we could make! Only $19!!

MY POINT IS:  Why did they even bloody bother with an awards presentation when every piece of Home Decorators table decor was handed to The King’s Speech on a gee-dee gold-tone platter:

Best Film: The King’s Speech

Outstanding British Film: The King’s Speech

Best Director: David Fincher, The Social Network

Best Foreign Language Film: The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

Best Animated Film: Toy Story 3

Best Leading Actor: Colin Firth, The King’s Speech

Best Leading Actress: Natalie Portman, Black Swan

Best Supporting Actor: The King’s Speech, Geoffrey Rush

Best Supporting Actress: Helena Bonham Carter, The King’s Speech

The Hot Piece of Ass and his date, Julianne Moore.

I saw maybe two minutes of the “I’d like the thank the Royal Family” awards ceremony–and thankfully, I got to see the Hot Piece of Ass, Tom Ford, look smug–as per usual–while sitting next to his muse, Julianne Moore.