Tag Archives: Forbes Top Earners

Forbes Magazine List 10 Highest Paid Actresses in Hollywood. Derrrrp.

"Eff YOU, Theron...I mean, Number FIVE." - Kristen Stewart


This LIST.   I actually get why Sourpuss Stewart is the Number One Highest Paid Actress in Hollywood,  (that’s what is tattooed on her middle finger, obviously).  Twihards seeing that movie over and over and over, PLUS merch? Did Sourpuss pull a Jack Nicholson (as The Joker in Tim Burton’s Batman) and get a crap-load of a percentage in lunchbox sales? I’ll bet she did.

Here’s the full list:

10. Jennifer (Only Good in “Horrible Bosses”) Aniston – $12 million

9. Kristen (Good for Her!) Wiig – $12 million

8. Meryl (We’re ALL So OVER) Streep – $12 million

7. The Sarah Jessica Parker Stables $15 million

The Stables

6. Julia (Also in The Stables) Roberts – $16 million

5. Charlize (“J’Adaaaaaaaaaah”) Theron – $18 million

4. Angelina Bloody Jolie – $20 million

3. Sandra (Did She Even Make a Film Lately?) Bullock – $25 million

2. Cameron (Spinster) Diaz – $34 million

1. KStew (aka “Sourpuss”) – $34.5 million

Congratulations…to some of you.