Tag Archives: Cringe-Fest

Jennifer Lopez Debuts Cover Artwork for ‘AKA’ – And I Just CAN’T With It

jennifer-lopez-AKA-cover

I was of the understanding that Jenny From the Block didn’t enjoy being referred to as “JLo“…maybe it was Skeletor who didn’t like it, since (circa 1999) Puff Daddy gave her the moniker. Well, JLo is big and loud and the album is named “A.K.A.” So nothing is what it seems. Actually, it is–and we’ve seen it before.  But this time, she’s wearing red patent leather.

Source

The mother to twins Emme and Max, 6, is shown with her hair pulled back into a ponytail on the top of her head. She accessorized the body-baring look with bold gold jewelry, matched to the cover lines of the artwork.

Lopez teased the image via Twitter, saying simply that the project was “coming soon.” The album is expected to hit stores on June 17.

The promotional photo follows the sexual nature of Lopez’s recent releases. She introduced the album with the single “I Luh Ya Papi” with French Montana, which includes lyrics like, “Got that hourglass for you, baby, look at these legs / No brakes, go green, no red / If you wanna kill the body, gotta start with the head / Put it on you, I’mma need about 4-5 beds.”

The “First Love” singer released her last studio album, Love?, in 2011. While the album performed well for Lopez, her most successful venture to date was her 2001 record J. Lo, which was certified multi-platinum and topped album charts worldwide.

Blech.  “Ohhmmm, I luh ya Papi”?? Nope. If I wanna listen to JLo, I’ll watch this and sing the background “yeah, yeah, yeah” part like a pro:

So, which one of you told me the “voice” you hear on all of JLo’s albums ISN’T REALLY HER singing? C’mon!  That’s really juicy.

Lana Del Rey on SNL – Let’s Discuss That Situation, Shall We?

Lana Del Rey

 

Here’s the thing.  You either LOVE Lana Del Rey or you loathe Lana Del Rey.

After reading DListed Michael K.’s hilariously spot-on “review” of Lana’s performance last night on SNL,I almost didn’t write about her because he freaking nailed itLana looked (and sounded) PETRIFIED.  Forpitysake, her album hasn’t even dropped yet (like how I sound like the “kids” there?).

I felt like a a stage mom, holding my breath, just PRAYING she would suddenly break through the fear and bring it.  But she kind of didn’t.  Be prepared to cringe a little…

via NBC.com

I know. I know.  You don’t have to tell me.  But. I’m still on board with Lana, so don’t even.

Take a listen to this and see what the wonders of production values can achieve.

 

Let’s all just hang tight, and knock off the pointing and laughing.  Lana may still prove herself to be able to sing live.  She had better, or she’s destined to have a career like Madonna or Jennifer Lopez or Britney Spears.

Wait. What?