Category Archives: The Royal Family

Prince William and Kate Are Expecting Their Second Child!


You guys.  You must know by now what a complete Royal Dork I am…so any good news like a new baby on the way will always makes me squeal.  In a statement, Clarence House issued the following announcement. 

“Their Royal Highnesses The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge are very pleased to announce that The Duchess of Cambridge is expecting their second child,” said the official announcement Monday morning. 

“The Queen and members of both families are delighted with the news.

As with her first pregnancy, The Duchess is suffering from Hyperemesis Gravidarum. Her Royal Highness will no longer accompany The Duke of Cambridge on their planned engagement in Oxford today. The Duchess of Cambridge is being treated by doctors at Kensington Palace.”


UGH! Bless Kate’s heart.  Some women’s bodies HATE being pregnant, and mine was one of them, too.  Yeah. My first (Royal!) son, Alexander weighed 7 lbs. 15 oz.–and I weighed 134 lbs. (5’7″)  AT DELIVERY . Bleh. I really feel for poor Kate.


I wonder how Prince George of Side-Eye will react when the new baby arrives…

Congratulations to William and Kate!


Trooping The Colour – What Exactly The Hell?

Members of the Royal Family attend Trooping the Colour
“I say, Grand Dad. You have a bit of…yeah…right there.”

What kind of gotdamn Royal Goon am I when I have no bloody idea what Trooping the Colour is all about? Listen, I really only care about the personal stuff with The Royal Family, like Harry in Las Vegas, the meaty thighs of Baby Prince George (and how much he looks like my son Alex when he was a baby), EVERYTHING about Kate, my undying love for William and his Mum Diana …and that’s really IT for Royal worship. Oh, and The Queen’s corgis!

Prince Philip and Prince Naughty Ginger
Prince Philip and Prince Naughty Ginger

What I really wanna know is, what the BLOODY HELL* is so funny??

THESE two.
THESE two.


No one…and I mean no one makes Kate laugh like her naughty, cheeky, bracelet-wearing Ginger brother-in-law. And I kind of love it. Seriously though. What’s so funny?

*See? I can talk fancy like them Royals.